Tag Archives: revision

IR + Personal Essays = Hearts

Learning Targets:

  • Students will identify examples of indirect characterization and use them as evidence in an original argument about characters in their reading.
  • Students will evaluate characterization in their own writing and revise their writing.
ON YOUR OWN:
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Step One: During Independent Reading, look for evidence of indirect characterization and make note of it. Start to evaluate whether or not your characters are truly great compared to other characters you’ve encountered on your journey as a reader.
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Step Two: Post in the Goodreads discussion “What makes a great character?” (Note: You must be a member of the Sheboygan Falls HS group first.) Follow the guidelines below:
  • Read what has already been written in the discussion. If someone’s comment is related to what you think or have observed, then “reply” directly to what they have written. Do not simply agree with what someone has said, build on it to make the ideas more clear or complex. 
  • Always include character names, author names, and book titles in your posts, so that the discussion can continue.
  • Develop a complete comment in paragraph form. Use specific details and examples from your reading to support your opinion on the topic.
  • Keep the tone of your posts generally positive. (Remember that this is your online identity that you are creating.) 
Step Three: Look at your own writing. How well have you developed yourself as a character in your personal essay?  Answer the following questions about yourself as a character in your personal essay. Use specific details from your essay. Turn in your answers at the end of class. While you are working, make revisions to your essay as you see necessary.
  • What does the character look like?
  • How does the character behave towards others? How do others behave toward the character?
  • What does the character seem to care about?
  • What adjectives does the author use to describe the character’s personality?
  • What does the character think or say?

If you complete this, please revisit the expectation for hyperlinks toward the bottom of the previous post.

Returning to Your Writing

Learning Targets

  • Students will clarify the differences between revision and editing, and engage in revision.
  • Students will review and select aspects of peer comments to inform their revision process.
  • Students will write a revision of their personal essay.
  • Students will research hyperlinks.

ON YOUR OWN

Settle in to your seat, focus on your task of becoming re-acquainted with your writing. There are few times when you are a room full of people that you do not actually interact with them, but this is one of those times. Interact with their comments, your thoughts, and the writing.

1: Reread your essay in the google document. Read the comments that you created yesterday and the comments that your reviewer left for you. Make a running list of “I MUST REVISE…” items on a piece of paper that you’ll keep next to your computer. While you read, clean up your document – if there are comments that are meaningless or no-longer necessary, ‘resolve’ or ‘delete’ them. (Don’t worry, they can always be recovered again later if necessary.)

2: Write. Revision sometimes means taking the same ideas and starting anew or building on your ideas with new anecdotes, details, or organization. Some of you already know the direction that you need to take your essay. Others need to consider the comments, the plot map, the examples, and more before it is clear, BUT you have to do this thinking and decide, as a writer, how to move forward.

REMEMBER the two purposes of this personal essay: First – Show your readers who you are. Not just how you look and act, but what you believe, think, wonder, value, and know. Second – Teach your readers something unique and important that you have learned from a person, activity, event, or neighborhood.

3: Research. In Hannah’s example essay, there are hyperlinks in her essay. Hyperlinks are words that a reader can click on and be linked to another place on the web. These links are to informative and reliable sites. They are there to answer some of the readers’ possible questions about the essay. If you are done with revision, start locating websites that might link meaningfully to your essay.

Plot Maps & Peer Review

In today’s class writers will develop a visual representation of the plot in their Personal Essay.

Maps must include the following:

  • Introduction: What is the first impression?
  • Big Picture: What is the big picture? When is it revealed and how?
  • Anecdotes: What stories are told? When to they appear? How do they help clarify the ‘big picture’ in the essay?
  • Sensory Details: Where are the most sensory significant areas of the essay?
  • Challenge/Conflict: What is it and where does it appear?
  • Climax/Main Event: At what point does something significantly change, relative to the ‘big picture’?
  • Conclusion: How does it end? Is the ‘big picture’ clear or are there too many questions?

—— > We will start with a group example  Hannah’s essay, “Impact”, from last year.

ON YOUR OWN

  1. If you don’t have a complete rough draft, CREATE ONE! This was an assignment due today. If you do have a rough draft, follow the directions below.
  2. Create a map for your essay using numbers, colors, arrows, symbols, lines, and more. Include all of the elements listed at the top of this post. If you cannot locate one of the elements in your essay, begin to revise your essay to include those items. If you can successfully locate all of the elements in your essay and represent them on your map, then you are on your way to peer review.
  3. Prepare your Google document for peer review:
    1. Read your personal essay. Toward the very end of your essay, using the comment tool state your “big picture,” the lesson you want your readers to learn
    2. Reread your narrative for a second time, this time through annotate your narrative using the comment tool. Summarize how your anecdote(s) get your readers to understand your “big picture”.